Here is my first birth story, from 2018, and my second from 2022.

Auður asked me to send it again, and then I wrote number 2 and am sending it here too.

1. June 2018

The first contraction came early in the morning on my due date. I used the ocean breath through the contractions and thought, as Auður had said, to receive each contraction like a wave and let it pass through the body. I did that rather than fighting it. For 12 hours I felt good at home, with contractions about 2-10 minutes apart. I was alone with myself and the little one inside me most of the day, as my boyfriend was trying his best to study for upcoming exams. I listened to music, including from yoga, danced and bounced on the ball, knitted a few stitches in between, and was never bored and felt good the whole time, so ready for this task! One song I connected with most and danced to was Gróðurhúsið by Amabadama, whose lyrics say: "I have a greenhouse in the garden, where I'm going to grow myself". It felt so fitting and empowering, besides having a good, easy beat. When the contractions spaced out, I walked up to the 5th floor of the building and back, to convince the boy that now he should come out and not change his mind. That day was wonderful.

I went to the hospital about 11-12 hours after the first contraction and was only 1 cm dilated. That was certainly disappointing, as it had become quite painful by then. Little did I know what was to come!

As the evening went on, the contractions became more painful and stronger. I was back at the hospital around 10:30 pm and was given gas, at about 4 cm. After midnight it became hard to breathe through the contractions, they were very close together and I simply forgot the ocean breath. My boyfriend had come with me to the Couples Evening, and he kept reminding me to breathe deeply by doing the ocean breath himself. I got into the bath, which was really good. I felt the urge to push far too early, when I was only 6 cm dilated. I could breathe through the first urges, but then my body took over and I pushed until I was fully dilated and for almost an hour after that, three hours in total.

When the boy came out through that remarkably narrow passage, he was placed on my chest straight away. Slimy and blue, he began his life by pooping on his mom. He was born at 3.4 kg and 49 cm.

At times I thought I couldn't do it, but with the support of my husband, my mother, the midwife and of course strength from within myself, I got through it, and I would do it many times over for my little golden-haired boy. What an experience. I felt like the only woman in the world who had ever felt this pain and the demanding trial that bringing a baby into the world is. It's the most amazing thing I've ever done, and I can't imagine anything as wild as giving birth. The body is amazing!

Birth number 2 was much shorter and different, 9 July 2022. Not as yoga-like, but births come in all shapes!

The day before my due date, a tiny bit of fluid leaked twice in the morning. I called the hospital and was told to keep an eye on it and come in for a check later in the day in case it was amniotic fluid. By evening nothing more had leaked, so the midwife on the phone thought it very unlikely to be amniotic fluid and told me to stay home. On my due date exactly the same happened, it leaked twice down my thighs in the morning, really a very small amount, about a tablespoon each time. I called the hospital and was asked to come in for a check at around 10:30. There it turned out it was amniotic fluid. The same woman who saw me was the one I had spoken to the evening before. She was, to say the least, very surprised it was amniotic fluid. Then I was admitted to the labor ward and induction started because of the risk of infection, since there was now a hole in the membranes (probably very high up and small).

I got the first tablet at 12:15. The head was still quite high, so they couldn't properly break the waters. The boy wasn't engaged but was head down. I was about 2 cm dilated at the start. I got a second tablet at 14:15, and around 4 pm the contractions had increased, so I didn't get any more tablets. I had my knitting with me and could knit on the yoga ball between contractions. I listened to music, danced and walked around, trying to keep moving to help him lower into the pelvis.

The waters were broken in the late afternoon, and with that the contractions got stronger. I got into the bath, which felt good in a way, but I didn't last long in it. I hadn't had an epidural in my first birth, but this time I asked for one. I got it around 7:30 pm. It didn't work well. They kept having to top it up and max the dose, and I still felt considerable pain. As in my first birth, I felt the urge to push far too early. I don't know how dilated I was then, probably about 6-8. I tried to breathe through the urge to push, but it was hard, because nature wants to take over and the pressure is so strong. I used the gas a lot and tried to move around. I was very aware of not just lying in bed, and walked and bounced on a ball as much as I could, but towards the end it was impossible and I stayed in bed, changing positions there.

I felt the head when it was halfway out. It's a strange feeling, warm and soft, but it gave me strength and the certainty that he was coming. And when he came out, after much shorter pushing than in my first birth, I reeeally felt the ring of fire I'd heard women talk about. An intense burning feeling, as if someone had a welding torch between my legs. Even so, I tore very little. He was born around 21:45 with his hand on his cheek, just like his big brother. He was big and strong, and it was such a relief to hold him, born at 4.2 kg and 53 cm.

The next day it turned out his skull bones had fused, which may explain the intense burning feeling I had then but not with my older boy, as the skull sutures didn't give way as they should. Besides having a big head (38.5 cm). It was corrected with surgery six months later, and my little boy is 2 years old today and thriving.

I felt this second birth was less of a big deal than the first. Maybe because I knew more about what I was getting into, and maybe also because it was much shorter. Now with my third baby, I feel I have no idea what to expect, because these two were so different in so many ways.

Coming to yoga with you, Auður, has been empowering in itself. Listening to you talk the whole time does much more for me than the stretches and exercises, though they surely help too. After my first pregnancy I heard an interview with you, and just hearing your voice made me decide to make time for yoga in my next pregnancy, even with a child at home and less time. And now in my third pregnancy I was determined too, even though I couldn't start until quite a bit later than the others. Grateful to have had a few weeks here.

Warm wishes, Tinna